With mixed emotions I am welcoming the first month of spring.  Depending on where you live, spring might still be far away – it might already have come, or you might not experience a lot of changes in seasons where you live.  Regardless of where you live, if the nature and the weather changes seasons or not, you might change seasons internally anyway.  Those changes can be called emotions or feelings, or even seasons within us.

If we for one moment go back to the changes we see around us in nature and what different types of weather we experience, we can all pretend that we have real winter with snow, cold weather and short dark days, then spring comes  with longer days and greener hills.  We soak up the sun with lighter days in the summer, and finally fall arrives with crisp air and trees with leaves in a ray of amber colors.  That’s a lot of dramatic changes in nature in one year.

The same can happen within ourselves in a year.  We can have a period of dark difficult times, easier days with spring in our steps, heavy weight on our shoulders that are lifted when we are surrounded by inspiring energy, and also days when we can reflect upon all the different colors and shades within our deepest self that shape us.

Where I live now we have small changes of seasons, and it’s very different from my country of origin, Sweden. In Sweden there are drastic changes between the four seasons.  With a lot of changes in the nature that surrounds us and the weather, we also will experience changes within.

With the sometimes rainy grey fall and longer darker winter months in certain parts of the world, it is easy to feel tired and a little low.  Sometimes you might also feel more lonely and separated from the world, as most people are hurrying down the streets to escape the harsh weather to find warm comfort inside a building.  Hiding from the outside in other words.   But the outside can be beautiful as well. There is a saying in my “old country”: “There is no bad weather – only bad clothing.”  Think of a hillside full of snow when the sun is shining.  It’s so glitteringly beautiful that it even can make us gasp for air.  Breathtaking in other words.  So with all the different seasons, it’s good and bad.  Just as life.

We have darker and more difficult days, whereas other days can lift us up and we feel energized.

Does everything affect us from the outside and in though? No, I will dare to say.  It is all about our attitude and reaction.  We are our thoughts.  As a result of our thoughts come a certain behavior.  So I’m pretty certain we are what our behavior shows.  Are we angry, bitter and resentful towards the world?  Or are we compassionate, empathic and loving to one another?

Whether we react to the weather changes outside, or to people around us, does not matter.  It is how we react to the outside world that defines us.  It defines who we truly are deep within.

It’s all like the serenity prayer.  You need to know what you cannot change, change what you can, and understand plus accept the difference.

So with all the words written above I’ve metaphorically compared changes in seasons in nature with changes of emotions within us.  That was intentional on my part.

It can be difficult to transfer from one season to another, as it can be very hard to come to terms with certain situations and circumstances in your life.  You just need to know what you can control or not.  Ultimately the only thing you can control is yourself.

So what do we do when it’s a grey rainy day? We might not like it, but we cannot change it.  All we can do is to grab a raincoat, umbrella, accept the weather as it is and step out into the street and greet the world anyway.

The same goes for when you’re being beaten down with one hardship after another in life.  You might not like it, but you cannot control what happens to you. Only how you react to it. You don’t need to like the situation you’re in, but you need to accept it.  Sit and really feel it.  There is no escape rout here.  As much as you cannot skip the downpour of the rain, you cannot jump over an obstacle in your life.  You need to walk right through it.  Getting soaked in tears perhaps instead of the rain.  And on the other side of the rainbow your tears will have landed in your heart.  Gently to flood your inner being of lessons learned and wisdom gained.

You made it out from your inner storm, and for that you came out stronger on the other side.  Believe me, there is no way to go around anything.  Whether it is a rain cloud or a heartbreak. The only way to make it in both circumstances is with a lot of determination to take one step at a time.  Forward.  All the while with a gentle heart towards yourself.

As I am writing, I am hearing gusty winds outside.  It makes the whole house shutter.  I am in a phase in my life where a lot of unwanted changes are happening and the future is as uncertain as always.  So at this moment, I do not know if this spring will be as bright and colorful for my heart as the flowers are in my garden right now. Or if there will be a constant shadow darkening my soul. No one can know what the future might bring and that is sometimes the beauty of life.  Right now though, I honestly wish I knew that the next couple of months would be a little brighter and full of colorful surprises feeding my soul.  Then I will try my best to bring some bright colors into someone else’s life.  Always pay it forward.  That is the gift of living.

I will end tonight’s writing with a sentence from one of my favorite Swedish poets – the late, Karin Boye, wrote: “It hurts when buds burst”.

So I am imagining that most of us at one time or several times in our life, we will have a bud that is about to burst open within us. The process might hurt a lot, but afterwards you will blossom.  I promise.

I am ready for spring and to let the bud inside of me burst.  It will be painful. I also know two more things:  it will be worth it and I will eventually blossom.

So will you!